WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME

(I love the ideas of Rick Warren in Answering life’s difficult questions. Thus, I owe every single script that he has written in his book. )

How should we respond when other people cause us trouble? A prime example brought on by other people is Joseph of the Old Testament, described in Genesis, Chapters 37-50.

As you recall, Joseph was the second-youngest of the twelve brothers, and the older brothers began to get especially jealous of Joseph because of their father’s favoritism to him. When the problem came to a head, the brothers threw Joseph into a pit and left him there to die. But some travelling merchants came by, and the brothers said, “Let’s just sell him instead of killing him.” So Joseph’s older brothers sold him to these foreign merchants, who took him as slave to Egypt.

So now Joseph is in the foreign country. He doesn’t know anybody, he can’t speak the language at first, and he’s enslaved against his will. On top of that, his master’s wife decides one day to seduce him. After he refuses, he falsely accuses him of rape and he gets thrown into prison. He is lonely and hurting, and has every right to ask, “Why me?”

But notice Joseph’s attitude many years later as he talks to his brothers about the whole situation: “You intended to harm him, but God intended it for good, accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” (Gen. 50:20). In other words, “You meant this for bad, but God turned it around and used it for good in my life and in your lives and in the lives of many other people.”

LEARNING FROM JOSEPH

Why was Joseph able to hang in there? Because of three important truths that he recognized in his life. First, Joseph knew that God sees everything we go through, and He cares. That’s very evident in Joseph’s life. He never doubted that God saw what was going on in his life and cared about it. There’s an important phrase that is found five times in the life of Joseph, each time after a major crisis or defeat: “But the Lord was with Joseph.” Even when everything was going wrong, the Lord was still with Joseph.

The second thing Joseph recognized was that God has given everybody freedom of choice. You are not a puppet of a robot who says little prayer to God. God gave all of us freedom of choice, and when we choose to ignore what’s right. God does not force His will on us. Often when we bring a problem upon ourselves, we blame God as if it were His fault. God gets blamed for many things that He never caused! When we see a major accident or tragedy or problem or crisis we try to sound spiritual by saying “It must be God’s will” __ as if God get’s enjoyment out of planning mistakes and heartaches.

The fact of the manner is that God’s will is not always done. God has a will for each of our lives, but he has given us free will too. When we choose to go our own way, He chooses to limit himself; He will allow us the freedom of choice to make mistakes and cause us the freedom of choice to make mistakes and cause problems in our own lives.

He also allows other people free choices, and from their mistakes they can hurt us. In Joseph’s situation his brothers willfully chose to plot against him. God allowed it because He didn’t make people to be puppets.

The third thing Joseph recognizes was that God is in ultimate control of the final outcome. He can take all our mistakes, and also all the sins that other people commit against us, then turn these around and bring good to out of them. Even though we may lose a battle here and there, God has already won the war. God will take even very bad things and turn them around. When we think everything is falling apart in our lives, God has the final say; He decides what is going to happen.

Consider Joseph, He was nearly killed, then sold into slavery, then accused of rape, then put into prison. His life was downhill up to that point. But God took these tragedies, turned them around, and brought much good out of them. While Joseph was in prison he made friends with the right-hand man of Pharaoh, and when this man this man was restored to power, Pharaoh had a dream. And this man remembered that Joseph could interpret dreams. Joseph was invited to the Pharaoh’s palace and interpreted the dream: “Pharaoh, God is telling you that you are going to have seven years of good crops and then seven years of famine, so you need to prepare for this.

Pharaoh was so impressed with Joseph that he made him second-in-command over all Egypt. Joseph went from foreign slave in prison to the second- greatest leader in Egypt, and by so doing he saved Egypt. Plus several other nations, including Israel from starvation.

God sees what’s going on, but he also has given the freedom of choice, and does not intervene against our free will. He has limited Himself. But He will use even our bad choices, and the bad things that happen to us, to turn things to around and bring good out of them in the final outcome – if we let Him. That’s why Joseph could say at the end of his life, “You meant it for harm, but God meant it for good.” The only way God could bring it for good was for Joseph to hang on, even when he didn’t understand it all.

COPING WITH ADVERSITY

Perhaps you are going through a trial right now. May be you’re an innocent party. May be you’re the victim of a situation that you didn’t cause. Well, consider Joseph’s reaction. The first thing he didn’t do was to give in to self-pity. If you were in the problem or trial right now, you can’t afford self-pity. That’s one of the major causes of depression. Usually when we’re in a serious problem, and our self-esteem is already at a low ebb, we start condemning ourselves and putting ourselves down, and we end up holding a pity party for ourselves.

Joseph didn’t do that, he didn’t blame himself. The crisis he was in was not his fault, and he tried to look at the situation realistically. When the boat is facing a storm, the way to make it is to face the wind head – on. If you let the boat turn sideways, the storm will capsize it. When the storms come into our lives, the best way to overcome is to face them head-on.

If you are in a period of discouragement because you’re going through a trial, and you’re asking yourself “why is this happening to me?” consider this: Never make a major decision when you are depressed. Often when we get discouraged we’re tempted to say, “I’m going to quit.” “I’m going to move.” I’m going to change jobs.” I’m going to get divorced.” Never make a major decision when you are depressed, because at the time you cannot exercise accurate judgment. Your focus is blurry and your perspective is distorted. Instead, face the storm head-on and don’t get involved in self-pity.

There’s another thing we see in Joseph’s life, when all those things were going wrong: he didn’t give in to bitterness. After many years Joseph met his brothers again because they had to go Egypt for grain. As they entered Joseph’s presence, bowing before the second-in-command over Egypt, they failed to recognize him as their younger brother.

When he tried to tell them who he was, they were both shocked and scared. Here was a brother they had tried to kill years earlier, and now they were bowing down to him. But Joseph forgave them. Joseph knew that you can not afford to excess baggage of bitterness in your life.

What should we do when we’re tempted to be bitter? Turn it over to the Lord. That’s what Joseph did. He maintained his faith and hope in God: he believes that things would work out well in the end, and he kept on with spiritual his spiritual life.

When things go wrong we often reject the person we need the most__the Lord. When a problem comes into your life you may start saying, “God, why did you allow this to happen? You may rebel against God as if it were His fault.

Instead you should say,” Lord, take this problem.” God can take situations that are totally bad and turn them around. When people use situations to try to destroy you, God can use them to develop you. He loves to turn crucifixion into resurrections.

The bible not only gives us answers to the reasons for suffering, but it also gives us practical help and comfort when we’re experiencing suffering. If we will apply the following sources of strength to our life, no situation can devastate and no crisis can tear us apart permanently.

THE PLAN OF GOD

The first source of strength that we see in Joseph’s life is the Plan of God: “In all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose” (Rom. 8:28). This verse does not say that everything is good, there’s a lot of evil in this world, and God’s will is not done. But it says that in the life of a Christian God makes all things, even the bad things, work out for good.

God has not rejected you; He’s got your best interests at heart. He’ll take this situation you are going through, even if it is terrible one, and will use it for a good overall purpose in your life. He’ll bring out greater glory in the long run. God is greater than any problem you will ever face. Of course it’s difficult to see how God is working in a bad situation while you are in it. But later, as you look back, your perspective is better and you can see what God was doing and how He used to this situation in a great purposeful way in your life.

When you understand this truth you can look back and say to people who give you a hard time. “You meant it for bad, God meant it for good. You meant it to destroy me, but God used it to develop me. You meant it to tear me down, but God used it to make me a stronger and more mature person.” No matter what happens __ even though you lose a battle__ the war has been won and the final outcome is in God’s hand. He will turn failures around and bring good out of them if you give Him the opportunity.

THE PROMISES OF GOD

There’s a second source of strength when we’re going through a crisis: the promises of God. There are over 7,000 promises of God in the Bible, and we need to start claiming them. They’re like blank checks, they need to be used.

I suggest that you pick out a few verses, write them down on some little cards, carry them in your pocket, and memorize them. One guy put verses on cards and struck them on his car’s sun visor. At every stoplight he’d flip the visor down and read a verse, and when the light turned green he’d flip it back an up. He’s memorized hundreds of verses just at spare time at stop lights, never spending extra time. You might put some verse up in your bathroom mirror. The promises of God give us hope, and they give us strength and comfort.

The Bible says that the Scriptures were written to encourage us and give us hope (Rom. 15:4). What we need to do is read God’s promises, memorize them, and then claim them in faith.

THE PEOPLE OF GOD

There is a third source of strength that should help us when we have to go through a crisis: the people of God. Every church ought to be a caring community of individuals where the people love each other, support each other, pray for each other, laugh together, cry together and share their burdens together. We need each other; God meant for the church to be a strong support system as we entourage each other and help each other.

But it can’t be a support system if we don’t know each other. We need to get involved I some kind of small group of people that we can meet with on a regular basis, and then share or lives with them and pray with them. As we do this, we’ll discover that there are other people who have the same problems that we do__ people who can encourage us. They will be people who live in the same or similar problems and are now on the other end; they been through the tunnel and so they can now reach in and help pull us through. The bible says that God often allows us to go through intense trials and problems; and then comforts us to what we in turn may offer comfort to others who go through the same situation (2 Cor. 1:3-4) God uses us in that way; He usually works on people through other people.

THE PRESENCE OF CHRIST

There’s a fourth source of strength in a crisis, and it’s the toughest of all: the presence of God in Jesus Christ __the person of Christ. The bible says that Jesus Christ is the God’s Son. That He is alive today, and that you can have a personal relationship with Him. That’s what the Bible teaches, and there are literally millions of people who are living proof, who have relationships with Christ. The presence of Christ can help us through any situation. Joseph in the Old Testament was an example of what Jesus Christ did in the New Testament: the Lord Jesus suffered blameless for the benefit of other people, Joseph suffered so that in the long run, when the famine came to the Middle East, and his policies of food storage would save thousands of people from starvation. That’s a bit similar to what Jesus Christ did even though he was perfect and blameless. He died on the cross to save us from the terrible consequence of sin.

God has given us free wills, so He could not force His will upon us without making us puppets or robots. We live in a world where people sin and hurt each other. But when we give our lives to Christ and trust Him. He sees us through each situation and gives the ability to see how He’s going to bring it all together in the end. The cross is the ultimate example of the people planning things for evil but God working them out for food and for the blessing of mankind.

Maybe you’ve been hurt deeply by a family member, as Joseph was -- perhaps a brother, sister, parent, husband, wife, or a boyfriend, or a girl friend. If so, do what Joseph did; don’t give in to self-pity or bitterness. Instead, take all the pieces and turn them over to Jesus Christ. Let Him bring something new and refreshing and beautiful out of that ugly situation.

But you may be thinking, it’s just not fair. I don’t deserve this.” Maybe you’ve got a friend who is in trouble and you say. “It’s just not fair that happened.”

And I reply, “You’re exactly right. There are a lot of unfair things happening in this world.” And that’s why one day at the end of the time the bible says God is going to settle the score. There will be a judgment day, when all of the hurt caused on innocent people will be corrected and justified. God is going to settle the score at the end of time. But for now our duty is to keep on keeping on and see what God can do in our own lives for our development instead of letting the unfair things devastate us.

So, I urge you, if you’re going through s situation where you are tempted to ask, “ why is this happening to me?” realize you’ve got a free will, and God looks on and wrong hurts him.—but He has bound Himself to allow others the freedom to choose. So turn to the plan of God. Turn to the promises of God. Rely on them. Turn to the people of God. Get involved in a warm church where you can have your needs met and you can be used to meet the needs of other people.

But most important, turn to the presence of Christ and let him into your life. Out of the worse God can bring the best. Many Christian can, in their own lives, look back and say,” that is so true. Everything had fallen apart in my life and then I gave my life to Christ and He began to put it back together. Turning your life over to Jesus Christ doesn’t mean that He will always take our or the storm, but it will give you the courage and the strength to weather it. All the things do not work together for good for everybody in this world. They’ll only work together for good if we give God the pieces and five Him our lives, and then He works things out for good. But as long as you hold back. He doesn’t work things out for your good.

So you need to believe in Christ, you need to be Christian, what the bible calls “born again.” What does that mean? You do two things, two simple words. One word is repent and the other is believe.” What is repent? It just means to change. Change the way you think about God and your sin. It leads to turning away from guild of forgiveness, turning away from selfishness and turning toward God. And then, you believe. You believe that God’s Son can forgive your sin, make your life better, and He wants to work in your life; that he has a plan for you and that He can take all the messes and bad situations and even your irritation and turn them around and use them for good in your life if you’ll let Him. Then you’ll be able to say as you look back. “They meant it for bad, when they were really sticking if to me. But God mean it for good. God used me and make me a better person, and I’m thankful for it.

I am dedicating my blogs to those people who have been helpingme grow positively despite of the storms that troubled me along the road . They  gave and still giving me strength. And shared some divine wits that I would use during tough times--how to carry myself and deal things in the midst of adversities.

My family_my Mother, my sister Nene Lumiares, leclec- who untiringly supporting me financially and morally ; my blind sister Daisy--who inspires me, Sis Maleen Bello--for being such a nice sister that never leaves us at times of odd moments_ she has been also supporting me financially, spiritually and morally. My nephew Janjan Lumiares_ for the support and care and everything.

I am giving special thanks to Sister Nida Bandoy__ for the unending prayers and all the supports. And being so sensitive in understanding me and my family.: for always being there keeping in touch with me; for the care and love... For Ptr Reu Bandoy - for His Preaching .which could transform the mind and emotion towards spiritual matters.  Ate Lyn Ortiz--for having such strong character that however influenced me a lot and gave me strength to stand strong . For Agnes Bandoy and Levy Moss, who keep touching me in internet at times when I am down_ they would appear to lend their shoulders. And all the rest of my families and friends_ they are all the reasons why I survived...

Above all others, God is my first and ultimate refuge. Though the world can't understand me, He is still the God who inspires me and never leaves me. In my confusion, guilt’s, dilemmas, desperation and frustrations and all the pains that I've been with, He is the Sole One who understands me and can explain why things just oddly exist and confuse me. He is really my breath...and He holds me and gets me survived till this very end. All my Praises for Him. Amen